the importance of loneliness.

 For many of us, aloneness is a negative state of being. Society doesn’t help us with this notion either; being alone often carries a social stigma, implying isolation, being on the outside.

This perceived sense of aloneness seems to imply that being by one’s self is not volitional, or a choice we make, but rather an imposed state where a person is not socially engaged in the way that is somehow expected. Even further, it may imply that there is something actually wrong or defective with a person who remains alone.

Social media gives us the impression — the illusion — that we are connected even if it’s only interacting with somebody’s words. Clicking “like” is the abbreviated form of saying, “I hear you and I agree.” Comments serve as conversation as if we had really interacted with that person in real time. Without this connection through devices, we may feel anxious that we will be alone and left out. But I believe that most of us really know in our heart of hearts that our constant focus on this kind of communication deprives us of having real human interaction. Even more importantly, this kind of communication may keep us from having meaningful communion with ourselves.

Unlike being alone, loneliness often implies that you are looking for someone or something that you feel you need in order to feel secure and happy. For some, loneliness may be a chronic condition where your own company is never enough; where spending time with yourself may produce anxiety and sometimes worse symptoms such as panic attacks and depression. For many, the perceived solution to keep this fear away is to make sure that you are always in the company of another.

In today's constantly connected world, finding solitude has become a lost art. We tend to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely, sad, or have antisocial tendencies. But seeking solitude can actually be quite healthy. In fact, there are many physical and psychological benefits of spending time alone.

Benefits of Seeking Solitude

Solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind

Constantly being "on" doesn't give your brain a chance to rest and replenish itself. Being by yourself with no distractions gives you the chance to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. It's an opportunity to revitalize your mind and body at the same time.

Solitude helps to improve concentration and increase productivity.

When you remove as many distractions and interruptions as you can from your day, you are better able to concentrate, which will help you get more work done in a shorter amount of time.

Solitude gives you an opportunity to discover yourself and find your own voice

When you're part of a group, you're more likely to go along with what the group is doing or thinking, which aren't always the actions you would take or the decisions you would make if you were on your own.

Solitude provides time for you to think deeply

Day-to-day responsibilities and commitments can make your to-do list seem as if it has no end. This constant motion prevents you from engaging in deep thought, which inhibits creativity and lessens productivity.

sometimes, work with a friend will help you solve the problems faster.

Solitude helps you work through problems more effectively

It's hard to think of effective solutions to problems when you're distracted by incoming information, regardless of whether the source is electronic or human.

Solitude can enhance the quality of your relationships with others

By spending time with yourself and gaining a better understanding of who you are and what you desire in life, you're more likely to make better choices about who you want to be around. You also may come to appreciate your relationships more after you've spent some time alone.